"Jack?"
"Hey, Daniel. How's the shoulder?"
"Fine, um, thanks.... Won't you come in?" Daniel said to the now empty doorway.
"Don't mind if I do," Jack said with a grin, already halfway across Daniel's living room. He tossed his leather jacket across the arm of the couch and made himself comfortable. "So, really--the shoulder's okay?"
"Just a little sore but no permanent damage," Daniel said, swinging his arm in a circle to demonstrate. "It just needed to be popped back into place."
"Good. That's good." Jack voice trailed off and he looked acutely uncomfortable.
"Something wrong?"
"Nope," Jack said quickly.
"Okay. Um...you want a beer?" Daniel asked, gesturing toward the kitchen.
"No, I think I should be sober this time," Jack said regretfully.
"This time?" Daniel asked.
"We need to talk."
"About?" Daniel asked apprehensively as he sat down on the other end of the couch.
"About the other night."
"Oh."
Daniel bit nervously at his lower lip. He had no clear memory of the night he'd dislocated his shoulder. Thanks to some heavy handed hints from Sam and Janet he knew he'd been slightly off his rocker. But all Daniel remembered was returning to the SGC from M8Y. And then waking up in a VIP room and being violently ill.
"You really don't remember a thing, do you?" Jack asked.
"Alien drug," Daniel reminded him.
"Yeah, about that...." Jack said, getting his "damn it, Daniel" look.
"I know!" Daniel cut him off. "I know. Lecture number five."
"And two."
"Two?" Daniel asked with surprise. He thought for a moment. "Oh, yeah, I guess there would be a two, too. Fine, okay--but could I just get the bullet point summaries this time?"
"Daniel!" Jack said with exasperation.
"Jack!" Daniel shot back. "Don't get all worked up over it. Nobody got hurt. Well, no one but me."
"And that makes it okay?" Jack asked sharply.
"It was stupid. I know that. And I don't know why I didn't tell Fraiser about the drug when we got back." Daniel shook his head ruefully. "I forgot...or something."
Jack gave a resigned sigh. One thing never changed and that was Daniel's knack for getting himself into trouble.
"So...how big an ass did I make of myself?" Daniel asked anxiously.
"You called Doc a slut," Jack said, conveniently forgetting to tell Daniel that Fraiser hadn't actually heard that particular comment.
"I...I didn't!"
"And I had no idea Teal'c had become the Don Jaffa of the infirmary."
"Oh, god," Daniel groaned. "Just tell me I didn't spill about the blue jello."
"Well," Jack said, a calculating gleam in his eye. "Not everything...and it's probably not as kinky as you made it sound...."
"I didn't tell you squat," Daniel said flatly, rebuffing Jack's attempt to fish for information.
"Hey--I didn't know you were such a Sinatra fan either," Jack said, ignoring the jello issue for the moment. He was still hopeful that he'd eventually get something on Carter.
"Sinatra? I'm not especially. My neighbors are. They're both huge fans of all those old crooners: Sinatra, Perry Como, Dean Mar...wha...?" Daniel stammered as the meaning of Jack's words sank in. "I sang?"
"Endlessly."
"Oh, boy. At least that explains why Teal'c keeps asking me to take him to karaoke night." Daniel wondered how he was going to convince Teal'c that singing was something he did only when drunk. Or implanted with an alien A.I.
"So which of your deep, dark secrets did I spill?" Daniel asked, hoping he hadn't been so far gone that he'd told Jack about Jack's 'Amore'-ous evening off-world.
"Ah, that," Jack said seriously. "You saved that for last...right before you passed out."
"Dare I ask?" Daniel said, thinking he probably shouldn't.
"You told me about how I sang on the 'Catharts-R-Us' planet." Jack cleared his throat nervously. "And how I, um, groped you."
Daniel's face lost all color beneath his tan.
"Oh. Shit," he gasped, staring at Jack wide eyed.
"That was my first reaction."
"I...I'm sorry, Jack. I wasn't going to tell you."
"Why not?" Jack asked. "I mean--I appreciate the fact that you didn't try to make my life a living hell for being such a jerk. But that was a pretty big bombshell I dropped there. I would've thought you'd want to, you know, talk about it."
"But you didn't intend to tell me," Daniel explained. "I assumed that you had your reasons for keeping it to yourself. I didn't think it was fair to take advantage of a moment of drunken indiscretion."
"I don't mind you knowing," Jack said, his lop-sided smile slowly lighting his face. "I wouldn't even mind if you took 'advantage' of my...ass."
Daniel stared at Jack, stunned into silence.
"What was it you said...?" Jack pretended to think. "Oh, yeah--you'd fuck my ass so hard I wouldn't be able to put together a full sentence for a week."
The color Daniel had lost moments ago came flooding back. His mouth moved soundlessly and a slight wheezing sound came from his chest.
"Daniel?" Jack asked, slightly concerned.
"Fuck," Daniel said in a small voice.
"That's what you promised. I gotta tell ya though--not that I doubt your technique or anything--but a week?" Jack shook his head doubtfully. "That's a pretty impressive claim."
"Fuck," Daniel groaned, hiding his face in his hands.
"Yeah, I think we've established that as the topic of conversation," Jack said.
"And you're not the least bit bothered by the fact that two apparently straight guys--meaning us--are talking about that particular topic?"
"'Apparently' being the key word there," Jack said calmly. "And no. Admittedly I hadn't decided when or even if I should tell you about my interest but it's out. I'm out. You're out. It's a done deal."
"So now what?" Daniel asked, finally daring to look at Jack again.
"Well, I thought we'd do it."
"Do it?"
"Yeah. I want it. You want it. I figured we'd just go ahead and do it," Jack said.
"Just like that?" Daniel said incredulously.
"You want to talk first?" Jack asked reluctantly.
"Well, this is...." Daniel said.
"Awkward?" Jack suggested, patting his hands nervously on his knees.
"A little," Daniel said. "I mean--it's weird to talk about it, too. It's something that should just...happen. Naturally. Talking about it seems so...."
"Weird?"
"Yes."
"So forget the talking and go straight to the doing."
"You're missing the point," Daniel said in exasperation. "We're allegedly civilized human beings but we're going to go to the bedroom, strip naked and just do it? God, maybe we should get drunk."
"Would it help if I sang to you first?"
"I can honestly say that of all the things I've fantasized you doing to, with, or for me, singing was not even on the list," Daniel said.
"What kinds of things?" Jack asked eagerly.
"Things that don't involve singing," Daniel said firmly. "Do you even know the words to any song but 'That's Amore'?"
"I don't even know the words to 'That's Amore'," Jack said, wondering what Daniel's point was.
"Exactly."
"Do you have to be so difficult?" Jack complained, still not sure what Daniel's point had been.
"I'm not trying to be difficult."
"No? What are you trying to be?"
"Logical, rational, mature...."
"Well, that's not helping," Jack said. He ran his hands thru his hair. "It shouldn't be this hard. I know you. You know me. We should be able to just...."
"Do it?"
"Yes!" Jack agreed. "And just to make one thing clear--I get to nail your ass first."
"Excuse me?!" Daniel snapped.
"I got dibs," Jack said.
"Since when?" Daniel asked hotly.
"Since I admitted it first."
"You were drunk!" Daniel protested.
"And you were stoned," Jack shot back. "Besides, we're both sober now and I brought it up first. You were still keeping it a secret."
"I was trying to be considerate of your feelings," Daniel said indignantly.
"Well, see--you should know better than that."
"You are such an asshole sometimes."
"You bet--but not this time. This time I'm nailing you," Jack said emphatically.
"Not."
"I so am."
"Flip you for it," Daniel offered.
"Two falls out of three?" Jack said, eyeing Daniel and calculating his first move.
"I meant flipping a coin, you mmppff!" Daniel looked up with surprise as Jack took him flat to the couch and captured his mouth. Daniel sank deep into the cushions under the weight of Jack's body.
"I thought we were feeling awkward," Daniel gasped when Jack finally let him breathe again.
"We got over it," Jack said, tugging at the buttons on Daniel's jeans.
"This is probably a really bad idea, isn't it?" Daniel said. The fact that he shoved Jack's shirt up and ran his hands greedily through Jack's chest hair negated his protest to some extent.
"Sending the two of us to Abydos the first time was a bad idea," Jack said bluntly. He yanked at Daniel's jeans until his genius got the message and lifted his hips enough for Jack to tug the jeans and briefs clear.
"Letting you stay on Abydos was a bad idea."
Jack nuzzled into Daniel's neck as Daniel unfastened Jack's belt and undid his fly. He wiggled helpfully as Daniel tried to push his clothing out of the way.
"Putting us on the same team was a bad idea," Jack continued with a growl. He pushed eagerly as his freed cock bumped against Daniel's, falling into a strong, demanding rhythm.
"And making me responsible for your safety was a bad idea."
"So what's your point?" Daniel asked. He arched up against Jack, straining to force their cocks together faster, stronger...oh, yeah, that was definitely better.
"My point is that yes--this is a bad idea. Most likely the single worst idea either of us has ever had," Jack growled back, rocking his hips sharply against Daniel's.
"Th-thanks for the vote of confidence," Daniel stuttered. His breath caught as the pressure on his cock grew strong enough to make his toes curl with agonizing pleasure. He gripped Jack's ass aggressively and thrust upward.
"I'm saying," Jack gasped, anchoring his hands on Daniel's shoulders and driving his cock against Daniel's belly. "All those things were bad ideas but they worked."
"So...so...." Daniel closed his eyes tightly and ground his hips frantically against Jack's. "This is such...oh, god...such a bad idea that...that...oh, fuck yes--harder...so bad that it has to work?"
"Y-y-yessssssssss!" Jack groaned as his cock became the center of his world for the short time it took to empty his balls. Daniel wrapped one leg around Jack's thigh for a few more thrusts and shuddered helplessly as his cock tried to outdo Jack's. In quantity if not quality.
After a few moments of slowly diminishing wheezing and shaking, Daniel opened his still dazed and dilated eyes.
"That was somewhat...abrupt," Daniel said in a shaky voice.
"Yeah," Jack agreed, noting with some chagrin that neither one of them had managed to completely remove a single item of clothing. "But on the bright side--it got that awkward first time out of the way."
"Um, Jack?" Daniel said as his breathing returned to normal.
"Yeah?" Jack asked drowsily, his head pillowed comfortably on Daniel's chest.
"Was that 'yes' a 'this is such a bad idea it has to work' yes, or a 'that feels so good it hurts give me more give it to me 'til I scream' yes?"
"Both. Definitely both."
"Um, Jack?"
"Yes, Daniel," Jack said with exaggerated patience.
"We still haven't resolved the ass issue."
"How about whoever is ready to go for the next round first gets to choose?" Jack said.
"You didn't take anything before you came over here, did you?" Daniel asked suspiciously as he felt Jack's cock give a little twitch against his thigh.
Jack just grinned as he reached up to take Daniel's mouth in a slow, deep, jaw-aching kiss.
"That would be cheating," Jack murmured. He shifted back down Daniel's body so that he could lay his head on Daniel's chest again.
"Exactly."
"I swear, as an officer and a gentleman, I am completely drug free."
"Gentleman?" Daniel said dryly.
"That's what it says in the brochure," Jack said. Daniel sniffed disdainfully but let it pass. As he felt himself being seduced into sleep by post coital languor, Daniel heard the faint sound of his neighbor's stereo.
"I've got you under my skin...," Daniel sang along to the soft, almost subliminal music.
"Not yet," Jack said with a groggy snort.
"I've got you deep in the heart of me...," Daniel continued, disregarding Jack's single-minded determination to claim his ass.
"So deep in my heart that you're really a part of me...."
"Working on it," Jack whispered against Daniel's skin. Daniel smiled but refused to interrupt his serenade. He figured it was one way he could indulge in a little sappiness without Jack giving him nine kinds of hell over it.
"I would sacrifice anything come what might for the sake of having you near...."
"You have no idea what you've gotten yourself into, do you?" Jack mumbled. Daniel figured they were even on that score. Jack might think he knew all of Daniel's ins and outs but he had yet to face the full impact of Daniel's unleashed libido.
"But why should I try to resist when, baby, I know so well, I've got you under my skin?"
Daniel sang to prove that not only was he capable of rendering an old classic with some small degree of style, but that even corny old love songs were capable of communicating a fundamental truth. Daniel continued to sing softly, his hand absently tracing abstract patterns on the skin of Jack's back.
Until a low snore interrupted his vocalizations.
"Everyone's a critic," Daniel whispered with an insulted sniff. He cocked his head as a thought occurred to him. Jack was sleeping. Daniel...wasn't. Which meant....
Daniel smiled evilly as heat began to build in his groin again.
"Kiss your ass goodbye, Jack, because it is so mine."