A travelling fair. Rides. Sideshows. I'm taking a few hours off. Blow
away the cobwebs. I've almost finished my preparations. Now, I need a breather
before my public lecture tomorrow.
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I'm still not entirely sure what drew me in here, though.
Because it was there, I suppose - a tall, circular red-and-white striped tent,
just like a fortune-teller's booth from the Middle Ages. “Cross me palm
with silver and I'll tell you what your future holds...”
I'd pulled the flap aside and entered. Now, I'm committed. No turning back.
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As my eyes become accustomed to the softer light after the bright sunshine
outside, I make out a still figure. She's sitting behind a rickety table
covered by a dark red velvet cloth that reaches the floor.
Brightly coloured bandana - large, prominent dark eyes that look right
through you to some distant horizon - weathered face - long dark hair, streaked
with grey, pouring over a full bosom - rings with gob-stopper stones on nearly
every finger - beads rattling with every movement... If that's what you're
expecting, Madam Azara doesn't disappoint.
“Welcome, my dear,” she smiles, “and please be seated.”
I sit down and hand over the specified fee. She opens an ornately carved box
of shesham wood and takes out something wrapped in black silk . Carefully, she
pulls back each corner of the silken square to reveal a deck of tarot cards.
“What's your birth sign, dear?” she asks.
“Cancer,” I tell her.
“Very nice, dear,” she says, “caring and
compassionate...”
She flips through the cards and selects one.
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“This is your Significator, dear - the King of
Cups.”
“What's that?” I ask, “a... Significator?”
“It represents you,” she replies and lays it in the centre of the
table.
The card shows a king seated on his throne which is surrounded by waves.
He's holding a large chalice.
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She passes the deck to me and tells me to shuffle them, including twisting
some top to bottom. I do so.
“Now,” she says as I offer her the pack again, “split the
deck into three piles with your left hand, and moving to the left. She collects
the three piles into one and starts laying individual cards out on the table.
“This covers you,” she tells me, putting a card
directly on top of my card.
It shows a young man in mediaeval costume. He carries his belongings in a
bag at the end of a staff over his shoulder and a white rose in the other hand.
A white dog prances beside him as he steps blithely towards the edge of a
cliff. Well, I can identify with that!
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“This crosses you.”
She lays a card at right angles on top of the first two, forming a cross. I
really don't like the look of that one. It shows a man lying face down under a
black sky. There are an awful lot of long swords sticking out of his back.
Euwww... She gives a quick glance in my direction as she draws a fourth card
and places it below the 'cross'.
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“This is below you.”
I can see the design better because the card is upside-down. (Is this a good
thing or a bad thing?) It looks like the Pope, dressed in red and raising a
hand in blessing over two monks. He holds a patriarchal cross in the other hand
and there are crossed keys at his feet.
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“This is behind you,” she says, laying the card to
the left of the cross, her left.
There is a pile of chalices at the front of the picture. The moon looks down
as a man in the background walks away towards a mountain.
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“This crowns you.”
The card, showing an old man with a staff and a lantern, is placed above the
crossed cards, and closest to me.
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“This is before you.”
It is a king in blue robes holding a large sword. The card is laid to the
right of the cross. More swords... Hm.
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The next four cards form a vertical line to her right of
that arrangement. At the bottom, a magician - upside-down - represents my
fears.
The card above it tells what other people are saying about me. There's a man
looking at some chalices floating on clouds.
The next card up represents my hopes. This looks better! There's a big star
with several smaller stars shining down on a naked girl. She's holding
two ewers and pouring water into a pool on one side and on to the grass on the
other.
Madam Azara gives me a strange look as she placed the last card on the
table. It indicates “the final outcome” and shows a priestess holding
a scroll. She's sitting between a black pillar and a white pillar and has a
slender crescent moon at her feet. Priestess, huh? Looks like my hopes aren't
about to be realized any time soon then - sigh.
Now the spiel begins.
“You are very unusual,” she begins, musingly. (Bet she says that
to every client!) “Rarely do I see so many key cards in a reading.”
“Key cards?”
“Cards of the Major Arcana,” she elaborates, without shedding any
light. “They are far more important than the those of the Minor
Arcana. On average, there are only two or three in a reading. You have six.
Clearly, you have an extraordinary future before you.”
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I have a future? I was seriously wondering, especially looking at that card
with all the swords sticking out of the guy's - dead guy's - back!
“The first card represents the reason that brought you to me - the aura
that surrounds you - the question you wish to be answered.”
“B-but I haven't asked a question,” I stammer.
“Not outwardly, no,” she agrees, “nevertheless, you came in
with a question in your mind - in your heart - and your first card is The
Fool...”
“Oh.”
I guess I sound a little put out at that as she chuckles richly.
“I'm thinking you're too smart to take these little pictures at face
value,” she smiles. “'The Fool' is a beautiful card, an important
card. The Fool is a hero of many stories...”
“Wow!”
A hero? Me? Um, don't think so.
“Pay attention! In an ordinary pack of playing cards, he has become the
Joker - a wild card. In the Middle Ages, he was known as the 'Lord of Misrule'.
As such, he brings a period of anarchy - of chaos . He's also associated with
Dionysus who was called 'phosphoros aster' or the 'light-bearing star' -
Dionysus, the god of free-spirit, of ecstasy, of madness - one who overturns
outworn traditions and brings enlightenment. And some call him 'the Babe in the
Abyss'...”
“Interesting— Um, what does this mean for me?”
“Not so hasty,” she grins, “I don't do, 'You will become rich
and famous - now sling your hook!' I believe in giving value for money.”
“Sorry - and thank you,” I say with a chastened smile.
“To continue, the Fool is about to take a leap of faith. He's not
looking back. He has all he needs to know already, packed into the bag over his
shoulder, and the white rose indicates freedom from all base desires. What does
it mean for you? Well, I think you're in for a bit of a rough ride for a while
and you're going to have to make a truly life-changing decision. The
card is upright, so it's probable that the decision you make will be the right
one. Make the right choice, and it'll take you on the journey of a lifetime
towards Divine Wisdom.”
I am - I am almost breathless. It sounds... wonderful! I have A Future! Then
I look at that card again. She sees where I'm looking.
“Was I wrong in thinking you're smart enough not to take the
pictures at face value?” Madam Azara chides.
“Um, sorry,” I mumble.
It does look pretty horrific, though.
“The card that crosses you indicates what forces may be opposing you -
for bad or good...”
“Good?”
“A barrier at a railway crossing opposes you. If it didn't...”
I take the point.
“Now, I'll grant you, the card that crosses you - the ten of swords -
looks a little off-putting,” she smiles, “and while it does indicate
sudden misfortune, it doesn't indicate violent physical death. Look beyond the
dark sky up above to the golden dawn beyond - to enlightenment. I'd say that
what is standing in your way are delusions. They must be swept away and then
you will set your feet on your path to the Divine Wisdom your seek.”
“Delusions?”
“Yes. And given that the Fool overturns the outdated traditional
beliefs, I'm thinking that you are the one who will break down the
delusions of others - or try to - and they will not thank you for it. Hence
chaos, but beyond that, your path will become clearer.”
“The delusions of others... It makes sense,” I reply.
It also makes sense that it won't be appreciated. To be told by someone
twenty years younger - thirty years - that one's life's work has been based on
a single basic error. No, it's not going to go down well. I could cancel - go
with the flow...
No. I couldn't. I'd just be compounding the error. Oh Hell! Why did I come
here? I must be mad. She's speaking again.
“The third card is below you. It refers to the foundation upon which
the present situation is based - things that are already a part of your life.
In your reading, it's another key card called 'The Hierophant', or sometimes,
the Pope. He's also the guide and mentor of the Fool. The Hierophant creates a
link between the material world and the spiritual world, enabling the Fool to
communicate with the gods. The Keys of Heaven at his feet signify an
understanding of good and evil. Normally, the Hierophant represents the
traditional teaching put out to the masses, but in your case, the card is
reversed.”
“Is that bad?”
I can't help butting in - disturbing the flow.
“Sometimes the meaning of a reversed card is less favourable - mostly,
in fact. Occasionally, it's better, and sometimes - as here - it's merely
different. In your case, it indicates unorthodox thought processes -
unconventionality. Your mind is open to new ideas, but you must guard
against... naïvety?”
That one hits home. Like the conventional idea of a fool, I do sometimes
rush in where... etc., etc. And regret it later. I look up at Madam Azara, and
find her smiling at me, as though she'd just read my mind. Hope she didn't.
Spooky feeling.
“The fourth card,” she continues, “shows influences that are
on their way out of your life - things that no longer have any validity for
you. This is represented - rather appropriately - by the eight of cups. The
waning moon shows that the old order is passing away to make way for a new one.
You see that the man has built up a neatly ordered display of the cups, right
at the front of the picture. He's put a lot of care into his work and now he's
walking away. They're full, but it's still not enough to keep him there. He's
abandoned the present situation and he's setting off for the distant mountain -
a bigger challenge. I begin to wonder why you've sought out my guidance,”
she smiles. “I think you've already decided where your way lies.”
“No. No, not really,” I demur. “I can sort of see what
probably lies in the immediate future. I have a choice of routes, but only one
if I'm to remain true to myself. Trouble is, if I take that route... The word
'pear-shaped' comes to mind. And then... I've really no idea what I'll do
next.”
“So you came to Madam Azara.”
It isn't a question - almost like she knew I was coming. I smile wryly and
she continues.
“The fifth card crowns you - that is to say, it is an influence which
may come into your life at some more distant time - or maybe not. It's
another key card, 'The Hermit'. He represents Absolute Wisdom. He carries a
lantern, lit by a six-pointed star within, and a long staff, providing both a
light to guide the seeker after wisdom and support when he needs it. This card
indicates a time of soul-searching - the need to work things out quietly. If
this comes to pass, there will come silent council from beyond this world. I
see someone who will guide you on your path - a path which may lead you on a
spiritual journey.”
“Um, that sounds - pretty... deep,” I murmur. “Sounds like
I'd have to die to make that sort of journey.”
“Death comes to all, eventually,” she says softly, “and many
times, a man meets his death on the road he takes to avoid it.”
“Oh,” I mouth soundlessly.
Her eyes crinkle at the corners in response.
“The next card represents something which lies in your very near
future, or your case, someone - the King of Swords.”
“A king?”
This all sounds pretty highflown stuff.
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“Probably not an actual king,” she grins.
“Kings usually stand for men in authority. This man will be involved in
something like the government, the military or the law.
He's a strong character, deeply committed to whatever he does - feared by his
enemies, but respected by his colleagues. He has a sense of fair play and
justice, but he's not easily swayed by pleas for mercy. He needs someone to
teach him compassion. I suspect that may be why fate is bringing him into your
life. Or you into his...”
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I smile inwardly. 'The government, the military or the law...' Can't see me
ever having anything to do with any of them, not at close quarters and
certainly not voluntarily - not unless they're mummified anyway.
“The seventh card represents your worries - fears even. It's yet
another key card - 'The Magician', and he's reversed. He's often thought of as
Hermes, the messenger of the gods, so he's a bit like the Hierophant in that he
creates a link between gods and men. While the Hierophant is concerned with the
spiritual side of things, the Magician's province is connected more with the
mind - the intellect. Hermes was also known as a trickster. I can see that it's
this negative aspect that concerns you. Knowledge is, of itself, power. It can
be misused, sometimes very destructively, so you do well to be aware of this.
And you can have too much information sometimes, so it's hard to see the wood
from the trees - leads to indecision. That can make you hesitate when you
really need to act.”
Madam Azara pauses to give me time to absorb what she's just said. Hm. I
don't dither - do I? More like the 'angels fear to tread' bit. Although, when I
come to think about it, the less I know, the more likely I am to rush in...
Oof, life's a minefield!
“Moving on, dear, the eighth card indicates what people are saying
about you, maybe to your face, but more often behind your back. This one's the
seven of cups. It's a rather dream-like card, with fairytale visions popping
out of each cup - see, dear, there's a dragon crawling out of one, a castle
rising from another. There's a heap of jewels and treasure and there, a
snake... And a man looking at them in wonder.”
“I think I can see where this one's going,” I remark, a little
sourly.
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“I said you were a smart man,” she smiles,
“and others would agree with me. They're saying, though, that you're -
yes, building castles in the air - have your head in the clouds. You have great
dreams and, if only you'd come back down to earth, you'd go a long way. It
seems that your friends think you're the one with the delusions. Note
that I do not say they are right...
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“The ninth card represents your hopes and aspirations - your dreams if
you like. 'The Star' is your fifth key card,” she tips her head on one
side, bird-like, and gives a knowing smile, “and it is the card of
hope and inspiration - and courage too. The main star is associated in the
tarot with the Star of Isis. The young maiden, and the life-giving water she
pours, stand for renewal, and her nakedness represents truth unveiled - she has
nothing to hide and nothing to fear. She shows that no destruction is final -
there are no endings, only new beginnings, and when help is needed, it will
come to you. You seem to be a singularly well-blessed young man.”
She's certainly given me a lot to think about here. Oh, wait. She's not done
yet.
“The last card represents the final outcome, and I really don't know
what to say here. This key card is 'The High Priestess'. It's connected with
esoteric matters, secrets. I suppose you could say that it is the Higher Powers
way of telling me that further information is... classified.”
She gives a deep chuckle.
“So what can I tell you? Very little, really. Cartomancy goes back to
the ancient of days. The High Priestess was long associated with the Egyptian
goddess, Isis. Hm - I don't know why, but I think you already know this?”
“Ah, well, it is a little familiar,” I confess.
“The soul has a long journey,” she says cryptically.
I'm not sure at this point whether she means past or future. Maybe both.
“The High Priestess carries a scroll containing the natural law and
wisdom of the universe, but it's half-hidden under her veil. Only a part of
that knowledge is available to mere mortals. Now, the crescent moon at her feet
symbolizes the sub-conscious - the hidden part of the mind. There is so much
secrecy here.”
This is getting way freaky. What am I? Some sort of cosmic James Bond? I
realize she's paused in her commentary, like she's aware every time my
attention wanders - gives me time to re-focus...
“The High Priestess sits between two pillars with lotus flowers carved
on the capitals. The black pillar, Boaz, represents darkness, destruction,
barrenness, wickedness - the negative side of life. The white pillar, Jakin, as
you'd expect, stands for the light, creation, fruitfulness, goodness - all the
positive aspects of life. As she sits between them, she holds the balance and
serenely maintains it. Perhaps you, too, will be faced with a balancing act -
playing the Devil's advocate. Maybe that's why this final card is so
indeterminate. To point you one way or another may destroy the cosmic balance.
Like her, you must use your intuition, dip into the well of knowledge in your
sub-conscious. Above all, preserve your integrity. Do not be swayed by earthly
influences. Remain pure of spirit and you will advance far beyond your fellow
man...”
She looks almost as if she's slipped into a trance state, eyes fixed on
something outside of this world.
“...The Shining One is waiting.”
She suddenly shakes herself and focusses on me again.
“You must go now. I can tell you no more. Good day.”
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Bemused by her abrupt dismissal, I step out, back into sunshine so bright
that it hurts my eyes. Ah well, time to get back to my lecture notes. The
future awaits.
Fizz.... Ting!
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